More news after this word from our sponsor.

I'm just impressed that the only word I mispelled was "ate".

Movie news out of the way, May first has now become the Million MJ March, law enforcement will be calling it probable cause day. For those of you, like me, who fear the vast expanses of those cavernous rubber rooms no longer need worry, a new chair is in development to replace these horrid rooms. Speaking of dark places, this guy at NYU quickly became an expert, he's lucky, I still can't even FIND the library. And lastly, fans of Sesame Street who attend Villanova will be delighted with the commencement speaker, the rest will be pissed at the amount of money they spent to be ushered into the working world by the words of Big Bird.

Anyway, I have a shitload of stuff to show you guys so hold on!

First, for those of you who missed it the other day, here is a nice little thing that will appeal to all the crackhead engineers that read this site.

And in puppy related news, we have a story about a dog who are 28 golf balls, and another one about a puppy who ate a kitchen knife!

Still related on the basis that there is something sharp in someone's body, here is a story about absent minded surgeon.

Not so related to the previous articles, here is one about a boy who may do some hard time for possession of a cookie. And what better to go with those cookies then a nice glass of milk from your obedient refrigerator?

To top it all off, here is a list of oddly named molecules. I would have to say my favorites are "Fucitol" and "Moronic Acid"

Yeah, that's all for now..

Crackheads and engineers, don't say I never gave ya nothin'.

56k Ver *coughfestus*

or

Large Ver

Right Click and save as.

In the news..I was catching up on the 30-some weeks of 8-bit Theater that I had missed and I happened across this little thing that Brian posted. All I can say is the future looks bright for human and mutant kind alike. :P

Oh, another thing that my buddy Font sent me over MSN is right here.. I feel it is fairly news worthy as it makes it so I don't have to go find some other stuff right now.

Anyway..here is Darth Vader's original Star Destroyer to cheer you up. :P

News is slow this morning, so, here's some crazy chickens and a one legged swimmer, she has requested that the racing lanes be changed to a circular shape.

Posting of the news may or may not commence at a later time.

Now, we had already returned from Kill Bill Volume 2, w00t, and DeRusto, Slamb, Dabney and I were occupying DeRusto�s room, once every ten minutes or so we would hear a strange beep, after a while we decided it was worth the effort to go investigate this intrusive sound, we wandered out into the hallway, assuming this noise must be the smoke alarm, Mr. Dabney, being ten feet tall, reached up and took the smoke alarm from the ceiling, we proceeded to instigate bleeding in our ears, verifying the smoke alarm was functional, so Dabney reaffixed the item. Disheartened, we wandered into the living room, investigating various cell phones and electronic items of the like, after hearing the noise again we intensified our search. I turned back to the hallway and saw the closet door (which contains the heater and other stuff I�m not allowed to touch,) so I said �Hey, maybe it�s the heater or something.� In the few steps it took to get to the closet door a random thought popped into my head and I said �Great, for some reason I�m scared there�s a body in the closet. Just before I open the door Dabney says �What�d you watch The Ring recently or something?� So, as the joyous rush of haunting images courses through my grey matter I open the closet door, nothing, of course. I turn, hands outstretched in a thanking gesture toward my asshole friend, �Thank you for those images-� Now, apparently Dabney had improperly restored the smoke alarm to it�s location, because at that moment BLADDAIR! The disc-like demon fell from the ceiling and landed in my hand, I proceeded to panic like a small child while everyone else laughed their asses off.

Well, now that we know I�m a coward, I have to run you people through a few future releases which caught my eye preceding KBV2 and The Punisher. First, we all remember Anaconda right? I mean good lord it sucked, so what do you do when a terrible giant reptile movie bombs? You make a sequel! Speaking of, what�s worse than a bad sequel? If Alien Resurrection taught us anything it�s a bad fourth movie. If you enjoyed Airplane, or if you think Snoop Dogg is entertaining, prepare yourself for Soul Plane, anyway, moving on, I have strengthened faith in Ben Stiller, I mean Zoolander was brilliant, and just the trailer for Dodgeball had me wetting my pants. That is all, I shall retire to my chair and ponder the existence of shoe horns.